I spent much of this afternoon fighting with iMovie, which is a past time that I take up once every few jobs until I realize I’m awful at it. I am, in fact, still awful at it, and it was interesting to be reminded that it’s relatively rarely that I do activities that I’m just straight-up not good at. Ideally I would want to say that it was helpful for growth and change but honestly I mostly just spent the time thinking that a marketer would have been able to make the video in, like, half the time and at twice the quality level.

Adult life includes with it a pretty significant degree of specialization, and things that I’m bad at I have generally simply elected not to do, in favor of things that I am good at, or which pay me money. Unlike middle school, in adulthood I can just never play a team sport again if I don’t want to, and can instead confine myself to peddling along on a fake bike. (Which, I’m not great at, but I do at the very least sort of understand how bikes work.)

I don’t know if it’s the fact that it’s warm here or the extra brainspace being eaten up by being awful at making a goofy little demo video, or what, but immediately after I finished work today I took a nap. I felt like I’d gotten hit by a car. I still feel sort of discombobulated, in the way that afternoon naps make one feel discombobulated, and I think if I was given the option I’d just go to bed right now, even if it is, uh, 5:30 pm. I don’t know if it’s a sign the antidepressant dose needs updating or I should stop fucking around on Twitter at 11pm but woof.

As my reward for not just sleeping I will be getting nachos tonight. The world truly is my oyster.

Shit to read

• I thought this, on tiktok stars, was good, and also a reminder of how completely variable your experience with the app is/can be—I have never seen any of these people, because mine is all queer 25 year old depressives who have learned how to shoot arrows for D&D cosplay.

• This was the least irritating take I’ve seen about the John Mulaney divorce/likely infidelity, which has involved a lot of “how dare you be sad when a performer’s persona does not match their actions, IDIOT” takes from people who think they are more interesting than they are. Celebrity rests on making others care about you, whether it’s because you’re the horse in a hospital wife guy or because you’re pretty and can dance sort of, and people can both be invested and aware of the literal performativeness of the persona. Infidelity is a bummer!

• I liked this essay on social class and the tech workplace.

• I spent this weekend reading The Extra Woman, a biography of Marjorie Hillis, who wrote Live Alone and Like It, for women doing both of those things. It was a pleasant, quick read about a woman whose life was much different than I would have assumed given her work (which I’ve read and enjoyed), and I remain tickled at how much of her advice holds true 75 years later.

Shit to eat

1. Wait for an unusual rain.

2. When it happens, in the evening, when you are hungry, chop up an onion and three cloves of garlic. Cook them with oil in a dutch oven until they are soft.

3. Add a cup of short-grain rice, toast it for a few minutes.

4. Add two tablespoons of rice wine, cook for a little bit.

5. In goes 2 teaspoons of kosher salt and some pepper.

6. Add five cups of water, and stir. Wait for everything to come to a boil. I always cheat this by turning the heat up, but you may be a more patient person.

7. When it does, cover the dutch oven and put everything in the oven for 30 minutes at 350.

8. Return, uncover, and stir the rice up. Add a knob of butter and a generous splash of whatever you put in your coffee, and then a handful of parmesan.

9. Stir, adjust seasonings, and eat out of a bowl. You will feel like you should have some vegetables, but also, you won’t.

(Adapted from parmesan oven risotto on Smitten Kitchen.)

Shit to listen to

• I was not aware of Build a Bitch until I read that tiktok article, but it’s going to be stuck in my head for the next week.

Shit to buy

• Do I need this dress? No. Do I want it? Look.