Emchap's Shit from the Internet 4/19/17 🍠
I'm currently in a weird place where I'm halfway through season 2 of Girls, season 5 of Sex and the City, season 2 of Rick and Morty (a show I still cannot figure out if I like or not), and halfway through season 1 of my seventeenth rewatch of Bojack.
I can't tell if my consumption of shows moooooostly about unlikeable people means something deeper or if this is actually a TV thing we've been doing for a long time and just keep thinking that we've reinvented each time think piece season comes back around or what. (Like at least one of them is about an unlikeable horse person so I'm going to go with probably not something else going on but who knows.)
By the way, if you aren't watching Chewing Gum it's on Netflix now and it's SO PERF.
Shit to read
As a person who works in tech, the phrase "0 factor authentication" made me laugh, but also, did you know that our entire system of paying taxes and like receiving money and everything is held together by tenuous and easily-violated systems? Just don't think about it, I guess!
I really enjoyed this article about the day to day life of a guy who is a halal cart vendor near my office, and it gave me context for some reform work an activist acquaintance of mine is pushing for.
Like I'm sure you already read Ijeoma Oluo's interview with Rachel Dolezal, but if you haven't it is AMAZING.
I used to play a game on first dates where I'd see how long I could go without making a noise that wasn't sort of a vague "mm-hm" affirming noise. (The answer tended to be 15-30 minutes. Progressive men, you are worse about this than you think you are.) I am an amusing conversationalist and a solid 40% of the men who've I've been out with in the last few years probably are unaware of this fact. Ask women things on dates.
I am SO EXCITED for the Handmaid's Tale series to come out. Read this on its aesthetics.
Shit to eat
Pull some vaguely-appetizing leftover pesto pasta from the fridge.
Prepare to reheat it on the stove.
While stirring, realize that you have been—all week!—seeing promoted tweets for adding cream cheese to pasta.
(It was a whole thing for Passover, there were zoodles involved, of course you don't own a spiralizer because $30 is this weird space for you because it isn't like no money but isn't enough for something really fun and so you've been putting off buying the spiralizer that Sweet Home recommends for six months or something. It's the same deal as the hand mixer.)
Given that you have a quarter block of cream cheese in the fridge and no more bagels, decide to give it a whirl, and drop half into the heating noodles.
Poke it with a spoon a bit.
Once everything has melted down, stir it up. Stop when everything seems... sauce consistency? This is why you're not a real cook.
Drop in a bowl and serve and realize that this is actually the only time you will ever engage with a promoted tweet that isn't an ad for the Avett Brothers.
Shit to listen to
This trailer for a web series called Brown Girls is hilarious; super recommend.
Kathleen Hanna is still around and this video from her band is rad as fuckkkkkk so good.
Shit to buy
This midi skirt, I dieeee.
Also this moto jacket.
You know what would make your life slightly better? A longer charging cable for you phone, is what. I like this one, by which I mean it's the one Sweet Home recommends and it's 6 feet long, which seems long enough to keep it plugged in to the wall while checking Twitter in bed like someone with garbage sleep habits. (No, I don't have a microUSB recommendation, sorry. Also can we talk about my ongoing desire to find out what the gender breakdown is on the user bases for Android vs. iOS, because ALL OF THE MEN I wind up getting numbers for off of Tinder have Android and every woman I know uses an iPhone? It's v. weird.)
I finally bought a portable charger for my phone because my phone died while I was trapped on a Delta flight on the way back from Austin a few weeks ago and with god as my witness that isn't happening again. (This one does have microUSB so I can keep texting you, if you are a man from Tinder whose number I have, or also not that but you use Android because something something diversifying tech ecosystems.)